Friday Bits & Pieces # 3
Packing anxiety, a simple white turkey bolognese recipe, VESTed interest, and links/recs for your weekend, including a beautiful, page-turning book.
Welcome to Friday Bits & Pieces, a monthly peek at some of the little bits and pieces of my life. Here I share things that power me from day to day; what I’m making, wearing, using on repeat, reading, listening to, etc. The stuff that enhances my life, makes it somehow easier, lights me up, or otherwise makes me feel good. Stuff I hope will make you feel good too.
And because I’m a wordy girl, I’ll toss a little essay into this midlife mood salad from time to time. I’ve been traveling a bit these past few weeks, so today I’m exploring my aversion to packing and the anxiety it always seems to induce. Wondering if anyone out there can relate, or alternatively, share some tips to help ease the pain LOL.
Big trip. Small trip. Road trip. Day trip. Sometimes I arrive at my destination and it’s more like acid trip!
What was I thinking? Why did I bring the new pants I’ve yet to style? Why are there four alternate tops but no toothbrush? Did I really need an emergency blazer? Three different sized hoop earrings? And don’t even get me started on shoes. At size 10+, taking more than a pair or two, especially if I’m including sneakers, is, well, challenging, and requires a degree of spatial relations abilities that I do not possess.
If you've been around these Substack parts, you know that I recently returned to NYC after a few months away in my hometown of Miami. It usually takes me a week or two to adjust and settle back in, but this year we traveled to events the first couple of weekends back, so my typical packing angst was amplified. I was still slightly disoriented, more than usual, as we had just moved into a new place in the city before we headed south in January. Additionally, I was barely unpacked before we hit the road again. And this week I’m back in Miami to work on a project and celebrate a special friend’s birthday, which should have been an easy “grab a duffel and go situation,” but alas, it was not, because I honestly had no idea what I had left behind.
Cue the tiny violin…
But seriously, while I believe wholeheartedly in my “better with age” ethos, in this respect, I am not better! I mean I’ve figured out how to minimize wrinkles (dry cleaner bags), and I can squeeze into a carry on most of the time along with my personal item (where last-minute giant shoes always land), but I am in awe of those with ninja-like packing skills who always arrive with everything they need, and then some, with room to spare.
And while at this point in my life I have learned to give myself grace, I’m less forgiving here. I mean, I’m pretty damn competent at 55 years old, and as Glennon Doyle says, I can do hard things! So what the hell is wrong with me, and why does a 22.7” x 15.4” x 9.6” container made of polycarbonate shell cause me so much dread? Why is it that I can pull together a look that makes me feel good most days, but when the time comes to pack, I stare into my closet like a deer in headlights?
It’s something I’ve considered more than a few times over my years of muddling through, and I think one of the issues for me is that I’m extremely mood-driven when it comes to getting dressed. How the hell am I supposed to know how I’ll feel next Tuesday? I also love having options for this very reason, but options take up space! Additionally, I currently find myself in a place where my style is evolving, and while it’s no 180 shift, I am feeling experimental and playing with some new ideas, which doesn’t leave a lot of room for backup if I don’t get it right. And by right, I mean that if I’m not feeling good in my clothes, not feeling like myself, it throws me off. There is also the matter of location and context, and wanting to vibe in a way that fits and feels natural. What’s more, the weather can be a complicating factor at this time of year, when depending on location, it can go from 75+℉ during the day to 45℉ at night. And while I know that layering is key, doesn’t that just mean more stuff to pack??
Perhaps there’s also an element of control involved, or rather, lack thereof. In my day-to-day life, while I have no illusion that I control much of anything, there is a rhythm, and a sense of predictability that does not exist when I’m away from home. Not knowing what to expect can be exhilarating and exciting, but if I’m being honest, it can also be a bit stress-inducing, no matter how much better I am at going with the flow these days. Will I be able to turn the thermostat down to 66° at night? Will the pillows be too firm? The thought of being unable to sleep (more than usual) can cause a panic-spiral! Oh, and so can the thought of not being able to get a decent cup of coffee in the morning (and by the way, did I remember to bring my Stevia?)!
Finally, no matter the length of the trip, you need what you need. Thyroid meds. MHT. Melatonin and magnesium (see sleep panic-spiral). And the other random sh*t that gets you through the day (or night, as it were)- I’ve recently added a small portable fan to the list (thanks so much, menopause), along with a little bluetooth speaker to drown out the hub's LOUD snoring. So much for streamlining.
So what’s a girl to do? Perhaps plan a bit better and spend more time trying on pre-travel? Watch some YouTube packing videos? Follow my brilliant friends, like
who seem to have it thoughtfully figured out? Maybe, but mostly, I am working on accepting the fact that while there are lots of things I’m pretty good at, packing will likely never be one of them! Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to buy a shower cap…Currently Making: Pasta with Turkey Bolognese Sauce
This is a go-to dish in my house that was inspired by a show I loved and binged a while back, Stanley Tucci: Searching for Italy. If possible, watching made me fall even more in love with the country of my heritage, as it so beautifully connected food and cooking to Italy’s rich culture and history. If ever I decide to decamp and live in another world, Italy would be the place.
Pasta gets a bad rap, but there are many healthy choices out there, such as lentil or chickpea pastas, and others made with ancient grains like amaranth, teff and quinoa. Many are gluten-free if you are sensitive or celiac, and packed with fiber and protein, two things we need to make sure we are getting enough of as we go through peri/menopause. This dish also features organic ground turkey, which is full of nutrients that also serve us well in midlife, such as Vitamin B6, B12, Selenium and Zinc, as well as protein (32 grams in a 4oz serving).
I used to make red bolognese, but learned from the show that this dish from Emilia-Romagna was actually created as a white sauce, and I’ve been making it that way ever since. It’s a delicious, requires very few ingredients, and comes together quickly.
Here’s what you’ll need:
1.5 TBS ghee or high smoke point oil such as grapeseed.
1 medium sweet onion, diced into 1/4 inch cubes
2 medium carrots, diced in 1/4 inch cubes
1 lb organic ground turkey
Box of your favorite pasta (I love Jovial Organic Brown Rice Tagliatelle but all of their pastas are great if you are gluten-free)
1/4 Cup organic vegetable or chicken broth
1/2 Tsp salt (or to taste)
1/4 Tsp pepper
1/2 Tsp garlic powder
Sprinkle of Italian spices
Splash of dry white wine (optional)
Pecorino Romano cheese to sprinkle on top (optional)
DIRECTIONS
Salt and boil the water and get your pasta started.
While that’s going, heat heavy sauté pan or dutch oven over medium heat and add the ghee or oil. Peel the carrots and dice along with the onion, add to pan and sauté for about 5 minutes or until soft and translucent. Next, add the ground turkey and use a silicone spatula to break into small pieces, sautéing until cooked through. I add the salt, pepper and spices during this stage of cooking. Next, add a splash of dry white wine if using, and let that cook down for a few minutes. Then add the chicken or vegetable broth. I use about 1/4 cup and then turn up the heat a bit (about 5-7 minutes) to let it cook down to desired “sauciness.” Add salt/pepper to taste.
Your pasta should be cooked at this point- I typically use tongs to move it from the pot into the sauté pan to mix it in with the chunky sauce. With this method, you get some of the starchy water involved which helps to thicken it all up a bit. You can also just reserve a little bit of the cooking water, drain pasta in a colandar and then mix it all together in the pan. However you get there, enjoy!
VESTed Interest
Even in the warmest of temps (it’s currently 89 degrees in Miami where I am spending the week), I like to add a third piece for interest, and a vest is a simple way to impart a dimension to your look without turning up the heat (especially important for many of us who are thermostatically challenged!).
There are so many options out there- sleeveless with a lapel, cropped and fitted, long and loose, etc.,- and you can find them at all price points. Below are some ways I’ve been styling with links to similar looks.
Links for above: Vest, Jeans and PJ’s in an XS on Poshmark…
Mood Salad Links & Recs
My Last Book: I could not put down Jessica Fein’s gorgeous memoir Breathtaking, and read it in one sitting last Sunday. It’s a compelling story of love, loss, family, resilience, and as author Joanna Rakoff put it, “a master class in how to be a person.” Jessica lost her beautiful daughter Dalia to a rare degenerative disease, and though what she and her family went through seems unimaginable, she tells their story with such humanity and wit, and through it all is able to find joy even in a sea of sorrow. At its heart this is a beautiful love story, and one that will leave you feeling hopeful and inspired. Jessica also hosts an amazing podcast called I Don’t Know How You Do It, where she interviews people whose lives also seem unimaginable from the outside- their stories are beyond inspiring and an incredible testament to the human spirit.
My Next Book (plus a great pod listen): I just ordered Miranda July’s All Fours, a book that’s been getting much press and was described in one article as a deep dive “into the mystery and miracle of being a middle aged woman.” I loved this rich, textured conversation July had with
on her podcast The Shift with Sam Baker about the unexpected wildness of aging, and am looking forward to reading what the New York Times called “the first great perimenopause novel.”Why the world should be very afraid of menopausal women. (via oprahdaily.com)
Gayle King on the cover of Sport’s Illustrated Swimsuit Edition at 69 years old! (vis sheknows.com)
A look at how that 2002 WHI study upended care for menopausal women. (via WAPO gifted article)
Talking to yourself? You are not alone! (via NYT gifted article)
An interesting look at how retirement brought unexpected relationship challenges for several couples. (via NYT Magazine gifted article)
And finally, I wanted to share some amazing (new to me) music by a trio called Khruangbin. It’s mostly instrumental, which I love to listen to when I work (I’m listening as I type!), but most focus flow playlists sound like something you might hear in the waiting room of your dentist’s office. Not this! Check them out for a fresh, modern and globally inspired take on instrumental beats.
As always, I’m so grateful you are here! I love hearing from you- your comments and ❤️ s mean the world to me and they also help others find us here! Please share if you know of someone who would enjoy.
Note that today’s newsletter contains some affiliate links, and if you click and buy certain items I may receive a small commission.
Have a wonderful weekend… Dina xx
“Why does a 22.7” x 15.4” x 9.6” container made of polycarbonate shell cause me so much dread?” 😂✨ Can. Relate! Love this, and the vest looks amazing! As does the pasta! Xxx
This was such a great read, so full of great intell. You rock a vest like no one! Plus, I shall be making this recipe for dinner, looks delish!!